Heat the oil in a large pot over medium heat. Add garlic and onion and cook, stirring occasionally, until onion is translucent and begins to caramelize, about 5 minutes. Season to taste with salt and pepper.
Add the chickpeas and cook, stirring frequently, until the chickpeas start to come apart and turn brown and crisp, about 8–10 minutes. Break up the chickpeas slightly as you go.
Add the coconut milk, spicy plant powered Ranch and stock, and season to taste with salt and pepper. Bring to a simmer, being sure to scrape the bits sticking to the bottom of the pan.
Cook, stirring occasionally, until thickened, about 25 minutes or until you’ve reached a consistency you like. Add the kale and stir, cooking until wilted, about 5 minutes more. Season one more time and serve warm with toasted pita, garnished with chives.